Sometimes I Leave My IPod Unsupervised at Work
…and when I return to my desk from doing whatever I was doing..usually something normal like going to the bathroom, getting coffee or lunch, or making a personal phone call..I find that I had forgotten to press the ‘pause’ button. Inevitably, because I listen to my music at the highest possible volume because I clearly want [...]
I can’t believe I have to go back to the AHOLE DMV. F*CK ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
NOTE: This post was written 1.5 years ago. Thanks to the prick who stole my wallet on Saturday I have to go back. WAY TOO SOON. Whoever you are, I hope you die a slow, painful death. Saturday, August 11, 2007 Adventures in the Jersey City DMV As punishment for losing my drivers license during July’s unfortunate [...]
Drugstore Items That You Don’t Want to Be Caught Dead Buying
They’re either disgusting, embarrassing…or just plain wrong. Either way you sure as hell don’t want anyone you know to catch you purchasing them (especially your boss, co-workers, or that hottie that you’ve been trying to bang). If any of these items are on your list, I recommend that you go to the 24 hour drugstore [...]
Windows Vista is the Fainting Goat of Operating Systems
Monday, September 15, 2008 by Natalie
When it gets overwhelmed or overstimulated, AKA scared, it just totally passes out, rendered helpless with it’s poor silly goat legs up in the air. Like a little b*tch. Except unlike a fainting goat, windows vista isn’t cute and adorable, nor does it incite hysterical laughter. Instead, it incites anger. Oh, and let’s also not forget that [...]
It Doesn’t Always Take Blood, Sweat & Tears to Move Someone’s Soul
Sun, Sep 21, 2008 by Natalie
When I was a 6 year girl living in Danville, California, I almost met Mother Theresa while visiting one of her Missionaries of Charity homes for AIDS patients in San Francisco. I was attending a Catholic elementary school which had been raising money for the Missionary, and my first grade teacher solicited a small group [...]
I’m Not Voting for McCain But Obama Scares Me
Fri, Sep 19, 2008 by Natalie
I know I’m not alone, so I guess those that feel the same way as me are just SOL. It’s kind of like being forced to choose between beef jerky and pork rinds after eating shit for 8 years. Either one will taste better, but they’ll both probably make you vomit. Granted, Obama is charismatic, and [...]
If you wipe out on the treadmill, I promise that I’ll point and laugh.
I just can’t help it. I’m sorry.
Too lazy to work out? Eating like crap? If your stomach is all beer and no six-pack, post a picture of this guy to your fridge. Every time you have an urge for ice-cream or Cheese Wiz, you’ll get too nauseous to complete to deed.
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Wednesday, April 22, 2009 by Natalie
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